It's not easy as Alif Ba Ta.

Assalamu'alaikum,

Here, I come back. Maybe, or someday, I'll be going so busy. Maybe. I've no idea right now what to write and because my life is not special like others do.

Hey, come on lah. I was safely arrived in Kuala Terengganu at 3.15 am. Wow. Sangat letih sebab semalam saya shif petang, balik pulak dalam pukul 9 lebih. Bertolak pun dah dekat pukul 1 pg. Semangat punya pasal nak balik.

Yeay, I miss my hometown where my heart is in it. I don't care what will other people talk about me. I'm talking nonsense everyday. I talk about others and no wonder people talk about me back. Being a woman is not easy. Just because our 'adat' in Malay is in front, a religion is putting behind.

Nice to see and saying that thing right? I always thought what will happen to me in the future, and always wondering about it. If my mother can live in this world more that 50 years, then, what about me it is.

I don't need someone to cry on, and for what? If he is my husband, yes, I will. * :O * . That's the point, isn't it? Haha. I'm not serious in this thing. I try my harder not to think about marriage yet, because I'm still thinking about my family, about my youngest brother and my youngest sister who are still schooling. And my brothers are not working yet. Including me.

It seems happy when I see others talking about hanging out with friends. But, I never find that's interesting. I never know why. When I'm going out somewhere, it really makes my eyes to shut down. And makes my stomach feels hungry, and my head dizzy.

I've something to do with my life, and I want to create it, but I don't know what it is. I've my own way, and I don't like to live under people, and be controlled.

It is sick, and I'm not strong. Right now, I still have my own work to be finished, and need to be sent on 7th May. And I have to study cause my final exam is around the corner. Ok, I'm nervous!

It feels like it has been so long I don't go home. How I miss my family. Wait till my exam finishes, and my practical in HUSM too.

I can't wait, I can't wait! This is my final semester, and I pray for my best! InsyaAllah. But, still, I'm thinking about my job in the future. Can I? Can I take it as a challenge? Even my heart was not with it? I don't know if I can do this. Oh Allah, please make my heart calms.

I've no interested in what I'm doing now. This is so true!

Family. Friends. Relatives. Future husband. 

:O

p/s : Nobody can really make you down, please keep moving on even thousands challenges you face, don't give up, and never. Allah is with us. InsyaAllah.